


tear out all your tenderness

by crownedcarl



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: (it's jackson don't worry abt it), Character Bashing (Mild), Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Gen, M/M, Mild Body Horror (Mentioned), Opposites Attract, Redemption, Sexual Tension, Sexuality Crisis, Teenage Drama, some crack but a negligible amount at best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-15
Updated: 2017-07-15
Packaged: 2018-12-02 07:24:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11504523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crownedcarl/pseuds/crownedcarl
Summary: There’s a quiver in his voice when Liam leans his head against her shoulder and says “I hope it’s love. I’m trying really hard to make it love.”(post season 6a; liam deals with the thing growing between him and theo.)





	tear out all your tenderness

Scott makes the decision, in the end, and Liam watches as Theo is shuffled away into Argent’s car, sitting in the backseat, more docile than Liam has ever seen him.

“Scott,” he says, a note of unease in his voice, “Is this really necessary? He saved me, and he helped _you-”_

Shaking his head, Scott gives him a look, his eyes soft; maybe Liam’s misreading things, but he’s almost certain Scott’s trying to tell him _I’m sorry, but this is the best I got_ without having to put it in words, and a lump forms in Liam’s throat. “I get it,” he offers, “But...hasn’t he proven we can trust him?”

“He hasn’t,” Scott argues, his voice still gentle. “Liam, he didn’t tell you anything about Douglas until he got something from you, first. I want to trust him, I do,” he assures, “But I can’t. Not yet.”

Mulishly, Liam scuffs his sneaker against the ground, huffing. “Yeah,” he agrees, “Except he took on a dozen Ghost Riders to buy me time. And, and then later, he came to help. Scott, come on,” Liam almost whines, “Why is it so hard for you to trust him?”

Giving Liam an odd look, Scott asks “Why is it so easy for you?” and Liam turns around and heads home, without answering.

-

“I hate this plan,” he reminds Scott in the morning, idling outside of the house Argent and Deaton had secured. “This is stupid. If he’s really evil, he’ll find a way to break out, and if he’s not, I don’t think being locked up and babysat is gonna make him act any nicer.”

Stiles gives Scott a pointed look, and Scott groans, waving a hand towards the house, pleading with his eyes. “I know it’s not foolproof,” he admits, “But it’s not forever, either. If he doesn’t cause any problems, we let him go. If he does…”

“We kill him?” Liam asks, and his voice is clipped. He doesn’t want that. The idea makes his stomach turn. It feels wrong, splitting everyone up into shifts to rotate in and out, keeping an eye on someone who is, for all intents and purposes, an ally. A powerful ally, but Scott’s not seeing that.

His voice is very soft and his hand is on Liam’s shoulder. “Of course not,” Scott promises. “I’m not his biggest fan, but we’re not killing anyone.”

“We got it,” Stiles sighs, “Now, can you please get the hell out of the car and go in there, already? I already did my time, dude.”

Liam mutters “Whatever,” and slides out of the Jeep, warily walking up to the house. He gestures for Stiles to do his thing, and watches as he kneels down and draws a tiny line in the modified barrier of mountain ash, a strain developed by Deaton specifically for Theo, before letting Liam step across.

He’s nervous, now, because he’s not too sure about this, and the werewolf thing might not be staggeringly confusing anymore, but he doesn’t know a lot about mountain ash. He’s a little scared something bad might happen. “So,” Liam asks, watching Stiles unite the powder again, “Your dad’s gonna let me out, right?”

“In three hours,” Stiles agrees, “Unless there’s a murder going on, which, knowing Beacon Hills, there _will_ be a bloodbath somewhere. Dude, just text me,” he says, clearly exasperated. “I’ll take a moment out of my precious time to come get you. Go inside already.”

Liam tries to remember all the wards put into place, but he’s still hesitant. The mountain ash outside the house is a last resort, in case Theo goes on a rampage. It’s the last thing standing between him and the general population, but Liam hates the thought of caging him like an animal, acting like he’s dangerous when Theo’s come a long way.

There’s other measures in place, other things keeping Theo in the house and on the grounds, and as far as Liam knows, they won’t affect him. All he has to do is get someone to help him past the mountain ash. He can do this.

“See you soon,” Scott chuckles, squeezing Liam’s shoulder. “Be careful.”

-

Theo’s in the kitchen, sitting on a stool, eating cereal.

“Hi,” Liam says, after an awkward silence has stretched between them. Theo’s staring, so Liam takes in the room around them; furnished, if not comfortable. He’s got a TV, and a stocked fridge, and a huge bathroom on the first floor. He’s got more space than Liam imagined, then feels guilty. Obviously Scott wouldn’t let Theo rot in some torture dungeon somewhere, but he’s surprised at how cozy the place looks.

A sweatshirt is balled up on the couch. Liam’s mouth twitches.

“Uh,” he stammers, tongue-tied and suddenly shy, “It’s a nice place?”

Theo inclines his head slightly, the way Scott does when he’s focusing, trying to track a scent or pinpoint a heartbeat. It makes Liam fidget, wondering what Theo’s listening to so intently. “It is,” he finally agrees, shoulders lifting in a shrug. “Minus the whole prisoner thing, it’s not too bad.”

“No, come on,” Liam protests, “You’re not a prisoner!”

He winces at the look Theo gives him. “Alright,” Liam relents. “Maybe you are. I’d be happy to switch places, dude. Your TV’s bigger than mine.”

While Theo goes back to his cereal, disinterested in Liam’s existence, he takes the time to explore. He drops his backpack in the kitchen, thinking to himself that Theo’s pretty unlikely to find something to use as a weapon in there, then feeling guilty for thinking that in the first place, and proceeds upstairs. It’s the same as the first floor, really. Straight out of a magazine, but devoid of any personality.

He doesn’t peer into what he guesses is Theo’s room, given that the door is open a crack and his scent is stronger in there than anywhere else. It just feels like one last violation. Theo’s already locked up, already being watched. Liam leaves his bedroom alone and jogs back down the stairs.

“I’m gonna do my homework,” he announces, dragging his backpack up off the floor and settling on the couch. “So, uh. Do whatever, I guess?”

He thinks he might glimpse a shadowed smirk when Theo dips his head and brings the spoon to his mouth, but Liam doesn’t think too hard about that.

He doesn’t let himself think too hard about a lot of things, lately.

-

Liam hangs out at Theo’s place after school on weekdays - that’s the schedule Stiles worked out, and Liam didn’t protest at the hours assigned to him. He doesn’t obsessively take notes on Theo’s behavior, the way Stiles does, and he doesn’t growl and snap at Theo like Malia does, so he’s not surprised when Theo starts to smell a little bit like he’s relieved when Liam’s shift comes around.

He doesn’t like thinking of it that way, as if he’s a babysitter or, worse, a prison guard. “Hey, dude,” Liam calls out, entering the house and going straight for the kitchen. He tends to find Theo there, most days, and he’s got a book open in front of him as the blender works in the background. “Smoothie?”

“Yup,” Theo says, not raising his eyes from the paperback in his hand. “Growing boys need their protein. Want some?”

He bets if Scott was here, he’d never accept anything from Theo, suspicious of any kindness. It hurts, a little, how Scott’s more wary nowadays, but Liam gets it.

Still. “Yeah, why not,” he mumbles, digging around in his pocket for his phone. He sends a text to Scott, letting him know he’s all settled and, no, Theo hasn’t tried to murder him, and then puts his phone on silent.

It gives him a feeling of excitement and guilt, all at once, defying Scott’s plea to keep his phone on and to keep in touch during his visits. Liam tries to ignore the feeling, curiously leaning over the counter to get a peek at Theo’s book. Unimpressed, Theo simply turns it around, practically shoving it in Liam’s face, but he scans the paragraphs quickly only to come away frowning.

“Is that guy really…? In front of his mom?”

Theo’s smirk is subdued, but Liam still takes offense. “Serial killer in the making,” he states, then chuckles, maybe seeing an irony there that Liam doesn’t. “It’s good, though. You should read it.”

“No, thanks,” Liam mutters, pulling up today’s load of homework and gesturing at it, maybe a little despairingly. “I’ve got to get this finished.”

Theo raises his chin, staring at the binders and worksheets. “Math?” he questions, and Liam mumbles “Yeah, and all the stuff I’m bad at, too,” and then blinks in surprise when Theo yanks the sheet towards himself and scans it over.

“Yeah,” he decides, “I got this.”

“...you’re gonna do my homework for me?”

“Not all of it,” Theo rolls his eyes, moving to the blender, doing something complex with it that Liam can’t keep up with. Before he knows it, Theo’s pouring two glasses for them both and bringing them over. For some reason, he sticks a straw in Liam’s glass. “I’m pretty good at math, though, and I’m bored. Bored enough that algorithms seem exciting.”

Liam physically cringes away from that statement. “Sorry,” he whispers, lowering his eyes to the English paper he’s been working on. “I told Scott this was dumb.”

“It’s not,” Theo snaps, “And don’t beat yourself up over it. Now drink your juice and do your homework.”

Liam mumbles “Yes, mom,” and smothers a laugh when Theo growls.

-

Theo’s been locked up for two weeks, and Liam can’t get through to Scott.

“He looks at me funny,” Stiles insists, crossing his arms. Malia nods vigorously.

“Yeah,” she scowls, “He smells like evil and misery.”

“Scott,” Liam pleads, “Hasn’t it been long enough?”

Shaking his head, Scott sighs. “A little longer,” he insists. “Only a little longer.”

“Fine!” Liam huffs, grabbing his things, “But if you’re all going to treat him like some criminal, don’t bother. I’m going over there tonight, and I’m _staying.”_

Scott doesn’t try to talk him out of it, and Liam tries to see it as a good thing. It still hurts, though, the fact that Scott thinks Theo’s dangerous and still lets Liam go.

He’s having a hard time dealing with what he wants, lately. Can’t have it both ways.

-

Why he’s so upset on Theo’s behalf, Liam can’t figure out, but he knows that something changed. At the station, in the car, at the hospital, things changed. He knows they did.

Liam has felt a little guilty, ever since, because it had been so easy to stand beside Theo and protect him even though he swore he wouldn't. It was so easy to laugh and cheer when the car got started, and then standing in that hallway, facing down certain death together. The fist-bump that never was, all of it is driving Liam a little crazy.

Sometimes, he wonders if it was all a ploy, but that’s not Theo, anymore. He had no reason to save Liam, but he did. He did it more than once, and if he’s planning on dismembering Liam and spelling out _SCOTT SUX_ by neatly arranging his severed limbs on the front porch, he’s not showing any signs of it.

Liam decides to ignore Scott, after he gets Mason to let him inside the house. Scott may be his alpha, but he doesn’t get to decide who Liam can and can’t hang out with, who he can and can’t trust.

It’s never going to go away, the fact that Theo committed his first murder when he was ten, but that doesn’t change what Theo did for him, and Liam wishes he didn’t resent him for that.

He maybe throws his backpack instead of setting it down, and while he’s pulling at his hair in the hallway, teeming with frustration, Theo peers around the corner with a raised eyebrow. “Scott?” he questions, undoubtedly able to smell Scott’s scent permeating the air, always an undercurrent to Liam’s own scent. Startled, Liam realizes that Theo is, too.

“He’s so stubborn!” Liam half-whispers, half-shouts. “He won’t listen to me. He never…”

Trailing off, flushing, Liam tries to laugh it off, adding “I’ll get over it. Sorry. Just…”

His hands are still clenched, and there’s blood in his palms, like during his first few shifts. He doesn’t want to lose control, right here and right now, and only notices that he’s trembling when Theo steps forward and puts his hands on Liam’s shoulders. He’s taller, so Liam has to tilt his chin up to look him in the eyes, then wonders why he’d do that. They’re not having a moment, or anything.

“You gotta breathe,” Theo tells him, all the amusement drained from his voice. “Focus on something else. A scent, or a memory, or-”

Almost gently - always almost, always barely-there, always driving Liam up the wall with his stupid mixed signals - Theo draws Liam a little closer, but not into an embrace, exactly. “Look at me,” Theo orders. “Listen to my heart. Focus on that, and only that.”

He does. Theo’s heart (his sister’s heart) beats slow and even, a reassuring rhythm that Liam clings to. He can’t pinpoint why he’s so angry but slowly, the sparks of rage in his blood fade to nothing. Afterward, disentangling himself from Theo - because his forehead had ended up on Theo’s shoulder - he whispers “Thanks,” and can’t make himself look Theo in the eyes.

He leaves early, that day.

-

Liam doesn’t know if he likes the person he becomes around Theo.

Stiles keeps telling him he’s too trusting, but Stiles is suspicious of everyone, and Liam thinks he’s got more than enough reasons to want to believe that Theo’s not all bad.

He keeps replaying it in his head, morbidly fascinated by the memory. Theo had given him something to latch on to in a moment of fear and distress, and Liam had accepted it gratefully.

In his bed, Liam twists and turns. He thinks about Theo’s expression, open and unguarded. He shivers.

-

Theo’s vulnerability is the strangest thing Liam’s come across, and he’s come across plenty of weird things; the berserkers, the dread doctors, the ghost riders. None of those things confused him half as much as Theo does, because as time goes on, Theo seems to be shrinking.

He gets withdrawn, moody. He barely speaks to Liam unless he has to, and it’s such a detour from the guy making him smoothies and doing his algebra that Liam tentatively tries to ask him about it, but he thinks he gets it. A month spent cooped up with nobody but Liam for company would probably drive anyone crazy, including Mason.

“I’m sorry,” Liam tells him, after Theo snaps at him for being too loud in the kitchen. “You know I have to be here. If it’s not me, it’s Malia or Stiles, and I know you don’t want them here.”

“I don’t want you here, either,” Theo scoffs, and it shouldn’t hurt, but it does. Liam’s shoulders go up, and Theo flashes him a smirk, the same awful expression on his face he used to give Liam before he went in the ground. “Did I strike a nerve?”

“No,” Liam bites out. “You’re just a jerk. Don’t know why I expected anything else.”

Not his best insult. It probably doesn’t even put a dent in Theo’s confidence, while his barbs all seem to stab Liam right through the heart.

He glares down at his homework, then startles and whirls when he hears heavy, hurried footsteps coming towards him. There’s a wild-eyed look flashing across Theo’s face, coming in bursts, like lightning. Liam squeezes his eyes shut and hopes that he doesn’t end up bleeding on the floor, and Theo slams him up against a wall, growling.

His mouth covers Liam’s, firm and harsh. A tongue licks behind his teeth. Fangs scrape across his lower lip.

“What-” Liam stutters, frozen under Theo’s weight, one hand pushed to the wall, kept there by Theo’s fingers around his wrist. “What are you doing?”

He doesn’t know if there’s a right or wrong answer to that question, because he shouldn’t trust Theo to do this, anyway, but his heart sinks when Theo hisses “I told you. I’m _bored,”_ and then Liam doesn’t have time for disappointment when Theo rolls his hips against Liam’s in a slow, dirty grind. A noise dies in his throat, a cut-off whimper that embarrasses him, makes him flush red.

He finds his willpower buried deep, and grunts “No,” shoving Theo away. That, at least, seems to give him pause. “I’m not - no. I’m with Hayden,” Liam insists, “And even if I wasn’t, you can’t just use people. You can’t use me,” he whispers, his voice sounding very small.

“Oh,” Theo says, sounding almost surprised. “You’re still-? She’s not on you,” he clarifies when Liam glares. “Barely there. Your scent’s all Scott, and…”

 _And me,_ he probably means to finish, but shows a little tact and doesn’t. “So we’re going through a rough patch,” Liam defends. “That’s...none of your business, actually.”

The silence stretches. “Don’t kiss me again,” Liam demands, and, finding that he can’t resist the urge, he adds “Not unless you have a better reason than being bored.”

He turns away, but Theo’s eyes are sparkling. “I can work with that,” he promises, and a phantom heat travels up Liam’s back. He slams the door on his way out.

-

“He kissed you?”

“For the third time, yes! How are you not getting this?”

Mason laughs, then bites down on the noise. It looks like it pains him. “Sorry, man,” he says, clearly struggling to keep his cool. “I just never thought I’d see the day, that’s all. Thought maybe you were deeper in denial than I ever was.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Liam asks, offended. “I’m not - I’m with Hayden.”

Shrugging, Mason clarifies. “Yeah, you are, but...are you _with_ her? She’s never around, anymore, and you’re always over there, with Theo.”

“What’s your point?”

Mason’s smile is soft. Liam slumps under the affectionate arm Mason slings around his shoulders, shaking him gently. “Nothing,” he says, “Except that maybe there’s more to this thing than you wanting to keep an eye on the guy.”

Reluctantly, Liam whispers “Maybe,” and feels something crumbling inside.

-

His next visit is short and painfully awkward. Liam barely looks at Theo, and Theo actually looks lost for the whole hour Liam spends there, hovering in the background, looking like he’s seconds away from saying something before deciding not to.

It starts to rain, and Liam braces himself to get soaked. He’s not going to catch pneumonia, not with his healing, but he still doesn’t look forward to walking home in the pouring rain. “Here,” Theo says, and Liam catches something soft that’s thrown at him, frowning at Theo, reluctantly making eye contact.

Now, Theo’s the one avoiding his eyes. “Just bring it back, later,” he says, giving Liam his back.

It’s oddly touching, and Liam briefly presses the sweatshirt to his face, slipping it on and rolling the sleeves up. He wonders if Theo noticed his moment of weakness.

“Thanks,” Liam says, “I guess,” and steps outside, into the storm.

-

Liam breaks up with Hayden in the worst way.

She’s in his room, standing in the doorway, when Liam blurts “I’m in love with someone else,” and her face goes through a journey; from surprise to relief to frustration. He wonders about the relief. He wonders about the frustration, too, but Hayden clears it up for him.

“I was going to break up with you!” she shouts, “God, Liam, can’t I have this one thing?”

“...sorry?” he offers, wringing his hands, making an effort to stop when he notices. “You’re not angry?”

“Not about the breakup,” she mumbles, then sits down next to him. The bed squeaks a little under their weight. “You could’ve been classier, you know? Or let me do it. I had a speech prepared.”

“Yeah?”

His mouth is twitching into a smile. “What were you going to say?”

Hayden throws her head back, laughing. “Actually,” she starts, “I was going to tell you that love is blind or something even cheesier, and that there’s a murderer waiting for you to make a move.”

“He’s not a murderer,” Liam protests, then flushes under Hayden’s knowing gaze. “Geez, alright! But I’m not…”

“It doesn’t matter,” she assures him. “We don’t get to choose, you know? That’s the part that’s fun, but also pretty terrifying. Things just happen, sometimes. And I guess he’s kind of hot.”

Liam isn’t upset at the fact that his best friend and his now ex-girlfriend saw his crush on Theo coming from a mile away, but he is upset at the fact that they think he’s thirteen years old, falling in love with the first person who catches his eye. “It’s not love,” Liam insists, feeling a thickness in his throat.

“Isn’t it?” Hayden questions gently.

There’s a quiver in his voice when Liam leans his head against her shoulder and says “I hope it’s love. I’m trying really hard to make it love.”

-

Scott’s promise falls through. Theo has been in that house for almost two months, and Liam’s visits are sporadic. He doesn’t know what to do around him, what to say, how to carry himself and how to respond to anything Theo says.

He’s had his doubts, from day one, that Theo is being genuine. Something lingers in the back of his head, because Theo fooled them all before, and Liam can’t take being just a pawn or a means to an end, but he’s scared to ask. He doesn’t want to make Theo mad when he’s already dealing with enough.

It still comes to a head, though, when Liam asks “What do you want from me? There has to be an easier way to get to Scott, right?”

Theo’s eyes rarely flash gold, but when they do, Liam takes an instinctive step backwards.

“You think that’s what this is?” he growls, “You think that’s who I am, now?”

Liam knows he screwed up, but he wants to hear Theo say it. He wants something from Theo other than his weird despondency and his occasional fits of anger; he wants something tangible to hold on to.

“Maybe I’m not the one scheming,” Theo points out, his claws digging into the back of the couch. “What about you, Liam? You think if you get close to me, I’ll play nice with Scott? That I’ll let you put me on a leash? I’m not the only one here that knows how to play games.”

Liam gets it, now, why the accusation hurts. It fills him with regret and the guilt is a black thing in his lungs, and before he knows it he shouts “That’s not it!”

While Theo stares at him with a challenge in his eyes, Liam says “I ended it, with Hayden. After you kissed me.”

He’s getting somewhere. Theo tilts his head, listening. Liam swallows through the dryness in his throat and mutters “I’m here all the time, right? And you...helped, when I was angry. And you kissed me, and I liked it, but you said you were just bored! How am I supposed to interpret that?”

“That,” Theo enunciates, “Was me finding a plausible reason, jackass. Wasn’t like you were expecting anything else, anyway. Not from me. Not when you’ve got me locked up and hidden away from all the nice citizens of Beacon Hills.”

Frustrated, Liam scowls “That’s not on me! God, you’re not listening, I _told_ you to give me a reason! A real reason, but you won’t, because this is a game to you, right? See how long I last before I let you make me stupid and reckless, maybe even set you free?”

He can hear the low rumble of Theo’s growl from all across the room. “Shut the hell up,” he snarls, “I’ll give you a fucking reason.”

He doesn’t slam their mouths together, the way he did last time. It’s shockingly gentle, and Liam shudders when Theo’s clawed hand strokes through his hair and curls around his neck, keeping him close.

Liam remembers the moment in the hospital, Theo’s surprised smile stretching his lips. He remembers thinking _I see him_ and realizes now that he wasn’t projecting; he saw something real, smiling back, and thought to himself _everything is going to be alright._

Nothing is alright, but Theo is kissing him and Liam is kissing him back, and he thinks that might be a good start. “What’s the reason?” he whispers, right up against Theo’s mouth, his hands finding their way to Theo’s arms and holding on.

As if it pains him to say it, Theo murmurs “Because I want to. Because I can’t _not._ Because…” he trails off, thumb finding Liam’s lower lip and tugging gently. “Because I think about it, all the time.”

Liam can’t resist the urge to ask; he wants to know if this lines up. “Since when?” he practically begs, because it matters. He saw Theo; he wants to know if Theo saw him, too.

There’s the faintest smile on Theo’s lips. “You know,” he promises. “You know when.”

Liam swallows, his mouth and throat dry. Closing his eyes, dragging Theo closer, he sighs “Yeah. Alright,” and leans up, fitting their mouths together.

Later, in the Jeep, Scott says “Liam, you _didn’t,”_ and Liam snaps “Shut up. Drive,” and smiles a little to himself on the uncomfortable ride home. Stiles wisely keeps his mouth shut, and things feel not alright, but getting there.

-

Lydia, surprisingly, is the least judgmental one. At least outwardly; she scares Liam, sometimes, because she sees and hears things he can’t. She knows things nobody else does, and she has an uncanny ability to see right through him.

“Don’t beat yourself up about it, sweetheart,” she advises, toeing the line between casual and dismissive. “My first boyfriend was a murderous lizard, and the next guy I dated was a murderous werewolf. We all make mistakes.”

He’s heard about the first boyfriend before, but he’s curious, now, at how Lydia doesn’t seem bothered by it. “But wasn’t he being controlled?” he asks, watching Lydia’s mouth purse.

“Yes,” she agrees, “But he told me he had some awareness. He knew something was wrong. He knew that for some reason, he was going out at night and killing people. He was just the conduit,” she sighs, “But it didn’t help that he didn’t feel any remorse at all.”

“But he wasn’t responsible,” Liam argues.

Lydia looks at him, then shrugs. “Maybe,” she deflects. “Point is, his hands were the ones ripping people apart. He remembered some of it, and he never felt bad. I’m not going to pretend I like Theo, but if he’s softening up for you, he’s already ten times the man Jackson ever was.”

Liam smiles, but quickly bites it back down. “You’re not going to be all...judgy?” he asks, gesturing vaguely towards Stiles, standing on the steps with Scott. “Or disapproving? Or try to talk me out of it because I’m too young and hormonal and whatever?”

Lydia’s laughter is like bells. “Honey,” she smiles, “The heart wants what the heart wants,” and she leaves it at that.

-

Theo takes him upstairs.

Liam isn’t anxious, exactly, but he’s somewhere on the spectrum between nervous and having a full-blown panic attack, but Theo leads him to his room and Liam goes willingly. He wonders about the fact that the house hardly smells like anyone but the two of them; wonders if the others stopped coming because they saw Theo as a lost cause long ago, or because they’re making a twisted attempt at giving the two of them some privacy.

He doesn’t like that, all of them pointedly avoiding the subject of Liam and Theo while keeping their distance, but right now, he doesn’t care. “Come here,” Theo says, his voice echoing a little, the room alive with the sound of it. “Just sit down for a second.”

His room is decorated with the decidedly rough touch of a teenage boy. A few posters, a shirt on the floor, a couple of empty soda cans on the desk. Liam thinks it’s nice; thinks it’s a real reflection of a person, rather than the mask Theo put on in those first few months of screwing everyone over and doing it with a smile.

The sweatshirt Liam borrowed is draped across the back of a chair. He tries to suppress a smile and fails, finding his way to the bed and sitting down beside Theo.

“I don’t care what Scott says,” Liam informs him, because unless Scott orders him to - and Scott would never - nothing is stopping Liam from doing the right thing. “You don’t have to stay here. I made Mason break the barrier.”

Theo’s eyebrows are surprisingly expressive. He manages to convey a wide range of emotions in a couple of seconds: shock, relief, suspicion. Liam doesn’t approve of the last one.

“And there’s no catch?” he asks, more curious than wary. “I walk out, and he won’t sic Malia on me?”

“He might,” Liam admits, “But I won’t let him get that far. You’re not that guy, anymore. You shouldn’t stay here if you don’t want to.”

He’s barely finished speaking when Theo kisses him again, and some part of Liam is waiting for it, waiting anxiously for Theo to laugh in his face and take off running, free at last, but he stays very still and kisses Liam softly, hands wandering beneath Liam’s shirt.

Sometimes, he thinks about Theo fucking him. It makes him shiver, teeth scraping Theo’s bottom lip, drawing a rich moan from him, and after that first taste, Liam does it again, eager for another breathless noise, something to prove that Theo wants this half as badly as Liam does.

“I’ll take a raincheck on the jailbreak,” Theo whispers, dragging Liam’s shirt up and off, mouth finding a sensitive spot on Liam’s neck, leaving a mark that won’t last. “Stay here, tonight.”

Liam whispers “Whatever you want,” and is terrified of the fact that he means it. Theo sighs “No more talking,” and Liam obliges, but the silence is never empty, not with Theo’s noises filling the air.

He falls asleep praying. _Please don’t be gone when I wake up,_ Liam thinks, and closes his eyes.

-

Theo’s eating cereal at the kitchen counter.

“Morning,” he calls, watching Liam briefly as he stumbles down the stairs, dressed in yesterday’s wrinkled clothes. “You want to go on a roadtrip?”

“Huh?” Liam mumbles, rubbing his eyes, not quite believing that Theo’s still there. He reaches out, bridges the gap, and finds warm skin under his palm. “Where? Why?”

Theo shrugs, half-smiling. “Thought I’d enjoy my freedom before Scott decides to take it away again,” he grins, tilting his head when Liam rests his chin on his shoulder from behind. “Come on, it’ll be a couple of hours, tops. What do you have to lose?”

Liam considers that. It doesn’t take long to reach a decision. “Let me grab my things,” he says, racing upstairs and then back down.

He leaves the door open on the way out. Stepping across the mountain ash, Theo grins at him and says “You ready?” and Liam has never been more convinced of anything than when he says “Yeah, I am,” and lets Theo guide him away, hand in hand.

**Author's Note:**

> for anyone that's curious, the book theo was reading that liam wrinkled his nose at was "we need to talk about kevin" by lionel shriver and i was, of course, referencing the notorious masturbation scene. it felt fitting.
> 
> other useless info: the title of this fic is from florence + the machine's song 'howl', and liam's quote about love is shamelessly taken from richard siken.


End file.
